Making up stories on vulnerability
Publish Date: Jan 08, 2021
looking at each other and there's tears coming because, you know, I can save for my wife. And I like we don't slow down and do that in our day to day life. It just doesn't happen for most people that they slow down and actually listen to each other. And so when that happens, you're in a totally different space for the conversation. Well, and I think you know, this is what you're saying about how this is the story I made up, right? Right. And if I really like, if I have to answer, what is the story I made up about this then? That is, um, you know, a portal into the unconscious, right? And we're making the unconscious conscious. And once we dio once, we can set it out on the table, you know, within a couple and a relationship, then I think we can begin Thio, take a look at our society as a whole. Right? And so when we come back, Thio how do we harness the power of you know? And the last thing that I their men are good. There are so many good men who I think feel like they get thrown under the bus and kind of bundled together with, You know, these stories that we hear about people who commit domestic violence and people that are abusers of Children sexually, physically. But you know, the facts are that men are predominantly the ones committing those crimes. And so there is, Ah, call to action and a crisis whereby, you know, our society, I think, needs to make conscious what has been unconscious. And I guess I'm curious. Do you have any thoughts on how to, you know, bring this to the forefront? Where, instead of we're talking about Well, why did she wear that skirt to the party? Or, you know, like the victim blaming and the victim shaming? How can we begin to change those questions? You know, Thio, Why airmen doing these things? Yeah, and it's It's interesting on a societal level when you see these conversations in the news. Certain political leaders, you know, just on Facebook conversations that are going on, the response of a person who is stuck in toxic masculinity is exactly what I'm talking about with these attributes, its defensive. It's sort of like explaining yourself. It's like I'm I'm gonna prove to you that that's not me. And so it becomes very character, Logical, you know, like, Oh, I'm going to show you that I'm not one of those guys. And so maybe I you know, I'm sure I'm a nice person. I'm a nice man, but it's missing the point. If I if I if someone brings that into the conversation, I say, Hey, but I have an eight year old daughter and my wife really loves me. Look at all these women in my life who think I'm great and I'm not one of those guys. All of a sudden the conversation is fallen flat. Then there's nowhere to go with that, And so part of the solution, this'd health.