mm mm hmm. You're listening to the positive professional with me. Tracy oven. Thanks for tuning back in and welcome to another episode. I am so excited today because I have an opportunity to interview someone who I was a guest on their podcast a week ago and he was nice enough to allow me to interview him for today's name is Sammy and today we're gonna be talking about mental health and wellness from the perspective of a millennial. So Sammy, please introduce yourself. Tell us about your podcast. Thanks appreciate chasing on. Yeah, we had a great conversation on my podcast. I was like, oh, I'd love to continue it. So appreciate you letting me join in on yours. For those of you. I just don't know my name is Sammy. I host the successful millennials podcast. As Tracy I mentioned, I am a millennial and I focused my podcast on the five categories of success and that's money, happiness, career slash purpose, physical and mental health and relationships, social relationships. So obviously mental health is one of those five categories and it's probably the biggest unknown. And so I like to bring some exposure and some of the things that I've learned to those conversations that we have. Cool. And how long have you had your podcast? I've published it for the best like month and a half now, I guess by the time this episode will be released and I've just been thinking about it for almost a year and a half. Didn't know if people would listen, didn't know if I would have enough material to talk about, how would I be able to make a good flow? And then I was like building confidence in myself that, you know, I have some ideas and I can share them and for the areas that I'm not as good at, I can bring in people who are better and who are experts and just talk to them about it. We can make things happen that way. It doesn't have to be always me and I don't have to be the one presenting everything. Half of the things is a conversation, a different perspective. And so that gave me kind of some motivation to start it and start releasing episodes and it's been thankfully received pretty well by some friends and family and expanding that way. Yes. And I listened to it and I truly enjoy and I really enjoyed the conversation right that we had when you interviewed me and you know me explaining imposter syndrome, right, and why my fear of not wanting to do my podcast. So if you can think of the one thing that made you say, you know what, I'm going to bite the bullet, I'm just going to do this. What was it for your podcast? I think it was just like, what's the point of procrastinating? Like, this is something I've been passionate about for a while and I'm a competitive person who always wants to improve on myself. So I was like, this is going to eat me alive. I know that people can do it and I feel like I can do it, I should just do it. Like regard, even if I mess up and even if I, it doesn't work out and whatever, maybe it just, I have to prove to myself that I can do it. And then when it happened in March in february, when I started it, I was like, okay, I can figure out how to record and edit and those other fears, like, I don't know if I can actually be able to do all this stuff, I'm not inclined to be able to edit and musically inclined, but I can figure things out and I figured out how to do and I'm like, okay, let's just do it and jump in. Cool. So now how do you feel success? Right is described between gen X and as I said, I'm a proud gen xer between gen X and millennials and then also a dad to that. What do you, how do you think the role of social media plays in reference to how maybe a gen X or millennial would describe success? That's a really good question. I think gen X are more grounded in the fact that they weren't necessarily growing up through social media. They experienced it more as an adult and so they were able to, I want to say fully developed their mind because I think everybody is constantly growing, but they weren't affected as much as a millennial who in my formative years in high school all these stuff started blowing up, started with my space, but then facebook really started catching on on instagram and twitter and all of them just became a staple of your life throughout high school and college and millennials and that makes it tough because you don't know what success looks like it becomes distorted. Some people are you know that you went to high school with are now like instagram models traveling the world and making money and okay so that's what success looks like. Some people don't post anything and then you know they seem like they have a nice relationship, some people over post and they on social media look like they have a great relationship and they don't and it's like okay now the image of social media is almost like it's a reflection of what people want to show and not necessarily what it is. So for me, and I think I would try to tell people as well as like, you can take it for what it is. It's a great way to connect to people, it's a great way to reach out to people if you have a business and marketing, it's a great way to expand your reach, but it is artificial and should not be a measurement of success at all. And I think gen xers nailed out on the head, they don't really care about social media, like status if you will as much as, unfortunately our generation doesn't even the generation after as the gens ears, they are, they were bored into it and they're just whatever is in social media is like, oh my God, this is what I need to be like, it shouldn't be viewed like that at all. So there's a joke sometimes that we'll see on like social media reference to like generation accidents, like there's certain things as I was growing up that was not documented right? On social media. And we were like, yeah, it's a generation where prom right? Our problem wasn't on social media and sometimes just those rituals that you would do with just the things that you engaged with, you know, for our generation, there was nothing for us to document it on social media and for us, you know, depending on how you managed your life. That's absolutely wonderful, right? And when you think of the generation now and with the need to constantly post and share sometimes overshare that sometimes gives people right. And I want to be able to have this conversation with you about happiness and how are you determining your own happiness or your own value in life, comparing it to what other people are posting and or sharing on social media. Yeah, I think happiness is out of the five categories that I cover is how that's the big one, that's what every all roads should lead to write, it should be the goal. How do you achieve it? I think it's like a moment in time is when you feel happy and the goal to me of being successful and happiness is too have that moment as often as possible. So I think what helps is, you know, working in something that you love and something that you're passionate about and it's not just being a hobby, like monetizing off of that because it feels great when you, when you're able to earn a living from something you love doing and that kind of handles the money and the purpose and now you feel energized, it's important to be mentally healthy or else you won't really be able to get out of your own head right? Like we both suffered from imposter syndrome getting started and imagine if we were a year in now, we would be in a different position now, but everybody deals with mental health struggles and if we can get that kind of cinched up where your best cheerleader and you're always going to strive to not be defeating yourself. I have this wristband. Now, this rubber band on my wrist as a neuro linguistic programming. It's a phenomenon where every time I have like a self defeating thought, where I'm I feel like I'm not good enough or I feel like I can't do something, I just snap the wrist and on my race. And obviously the pain of it stops your train of thought because like in your front a little bit, something called the Amygdala which is processed the emotion and it takes like a 0.3 seconds or point oh three seconds after your reaction. So you react to something before you emotionally respond to it in your brain. So the idea of the snap is like it cuts off the reaction before you emotionally process because now you're focused on pain and then you give them Magdala enough time to process it actually. And I OK, this isn't that big of a deal. So like limits, overreacting or limits the tunneling of self defeating thoughts. Honestly this and I would just wear now. It's been years. I just feel like a part of my life now. I just always have it as a reminder to not be self defeating and too self critical. And where did you learn that? I read it from a combination of two books. So there's one of my favorite books of all time psycho cybernetics mentions. NLP and it mentions a lot of how the medulla processes information. And then there's another book called Power of Optimism by Alan Lloyd Mcguinness. And that one had given a realistic, optimistic approach of life, not Pollyanna. And he goes into a little bit of crazy detail, but he had recommended the rubber band approach. And so I just combined like rubber band approach and the science behind why it works. And I was like okay, I'm gonna actually do this. And that was I would like to say late 2018 I read those books. Okay, yeah, there's different ways, right? You can help with processing and dealing with your thoughts and stuff. So those you know, there's several ways to it now when you think of social media, right? And this is one question I like to always ask millennials because I know what life was like right without it. So what do you think life would be like if there was no social media and I'm not talking about? Of course there was always new stations but not like facebook, instagram, twitter and these other apps that are now coming out, what do you think life would look like if there were no social media? That's a great question. I I thought about this like, okay, what it would like be better without social media, I play that type of scenario in my head often and it's like, I feel like there would be less creativity in the world is one of the big things of social media, the ability to just like share stuff and be like okay grab ideas from what this person has what this person has and try to recreate it and and expand upon it. That's one of the biggest benefits of social media. So without it, we wouldn't have as much creativity. But I do think the world would be a little bit slower paced now. Like you mentioned, there's news stations, but what is there every hour they run something, right? And I'm not a big news person because I don't think it's helpful to your mental state at all. The only spew the negative stuff that feels like, But social media is instant. So you get desensitized to a lot of information, okay, there's there's a shooting and then there's another killing and then there's another bombing and then there's another like, it just, okay, how many people died and it's just a number on the screen. And then you're like, almost I don't really feel anything because I don't know these people, it just feels like there's everything is there all the time, and you can't really escape it because it's on your phone that you carry all the time. So I think people would be in a little bit happier, but it would be a more slow paced, less creative environment if we didn't have social media at all. You know, they say it's a gift and a curse, right? It's helpful to provide information. And again, in reference to, like, mental health and wellness, there's a lot of information that you can receive on, like, self care tips and you know, how to take care of yourself and how to be kind and supportive to others. A lot of people use it of course for a lot of advocacy, right? Which is needed. But on the other side of it, it's it's just looking at what other people do in their lifestyle and things like that, right? There were no like influencers or stuff like that, which is I'm still trying to understand and grasp the term of it, but that wasn't my generation and there's just different ways of, of how it's being done and you know, there were corporations and stuff that were very successful of course, without socially, but of course, as the world is evolved, it is important. It's been very helpful, right, as far as for even for me promoting this podcast and I'm sure for yours, but I am also just very Michael and also understanding when I'm working with the millennial or gen gen Z to also be understanding that that's because that wasn't necessarily my experience when I was at that age, that having compassion and understanding of how it's working for and like for your generation now, and not just assuming that someone can just turn it off right, this is this is what you all know. But yeah, but it's it's I think it's important conversation to have because it's relied on a lot and sometimes it's relied on for self worth validation and happiness and that's dangerous, agreed. Yeah. I remember in college we did an ethics paper on really whatever topic we wanted and I picked social media and its impact and it's like we did, uh, it's a bonus three days, 72 hours, no internet unless it was for school work. So not even like directions, not, you know, Spotify music or Apple music, not scrolling through instagram or any other social media, not any games that use in like no internet at all, no electronics and um, 72 hours and this was almost like eight years ago now, 667 years ago. So we weren't I guess as addicted, but it was still pretty hard, like I barely made it and I was lucky it was finals week because I had to study. But like other than that it was, I don't know if I can make it now 72 hours, just don't look at your phone, don't look at any internet, like everybody's life is revolved around the mine included. And I think it's important to take some unplugs and mute group chats or just check it only at certain block times instead of just on board. Let me look at my social media feed. That's kind of some of the things that I do, but this thing, it's important to start doing more like at least one day cleanses or something. It's going to be a friend of mine, a very good friend of mine, she's a professor at stony brook started on Fridays at 5 30 to have no social media until the next next day. And she, she reminds me to do it and I know she's gonna listen to this and she's going to text with like you have the audacity to talk about this, but you didn't do it. So I will be intentional, we're doing it this friday, but it's something that she started and she said she shared with her students and it was just friday, no social media at all until the next day. So it's, it's again like we took but starting small. So I am going to be intentional with um trying that. Yeah, I need to do that as well. We have to share results with each other to motivate each other. It is, it's a tough world without especially friday night and that's probably where everybody is most active as well. So it's a good, it's a good use of which day she does, she said friday at five and she does it with some of her other co workers and we've been friends for years. I'm going to be intentional with starting to do that and I think that can be very helpful because there's of course there's other things to do right in life besides social media and sometimes we just need to be a, need a reminder about reconnecting with the other things besides that right now, in reference to as a millennial, right? What does self care and wellness mean to you as millennium? I think self care is about your routine. So look, I I have to hit the gym like I just have to and that's my way I can be stress or either it's either jim or basketball or I need to get active and it helps me at home, I feel in my element, I feel motivated and energized, so it kind of recharges me for the next day's stress or the next day's work load or whatever it may be. So I think that helps me in terms of keeping my routine intact and keeping myself healthy if you will. And then from a wellness perspective it's I tried to I mean I used the rubber band to kind of limit rabbit holes of negativity, but I think it's also important to have some positivity as well or some reflection points. So at the end of every week I make my to do list of the next week and then I like, okay, how did I do last week? Did I miss anything that I should have? Why was that? Is there something that can change? And then reflect? and pretty much like it's ok that I wasn't perfect. I was been doing better and I'm making an intentional movement and then let's see how we can remove whatever was that blocker that caused me to miss last week? And let's try to include that and it's probably going to be 34 blockers, right? So you take one at a time and don't beat yourself up too much about it, but we can't be complacent. So um I always try to improve at least one at a time and then you see the, see the numbers of things to do go down hopefully. And that gives me more ease. I feel like I'm more mindful when I'm not as stressed. Very good. If you can think of one thing that you would like, let's just say for the gen x, right? For my generation to have a better understanding of when it comes to millennials, what do you think that should be? Oh man, that's tough. There's a lot, I think our generations are very misunderstood. For whatever reason it may be, but I think millennials, because there's so much going on in terms of information age and there's just, they've been like handed social media internet at a young age in their formative years, there's just so much stuff out there, they seem to not make a decision as fast and that's kind of what the, they're less hard working or, you know, they don't know what they want as a lot of the kind of the criticism that our generation or my generation received. And I think it's mostly because we really don't like back in the day and the generations before us, it was, you know, you're pretty much not gonna leave that area that you grew up in or if you do, it's a very big move and there's certain industries out there that you can work in. So there's not much options now. Technology makes you could be able to do whatever you want wherever you want and to tell us 18 year olds going into college, what are you going to do for the rest of your life is a, there's too many options like the limitless option theater, right, Is, I don't know what I want to do, nor should I have to at 18. And so millennials are kind of like, they're, they're focused more on finding out what they want to do, what's their passion and added at the expense of going through the standard in a college, maybe masters corporate life and making money that way where it's a high floor in terms of income, but it's not necessarily a low ceiling, they would prefer to find something in their passion and I think it's very admirable. I think I took me a while, I was luckily able to graduate early and find things on my own passion wise. But millennials are very, very keen on trying to work in their passion and it takes time because she won't know your passion 18 and it will change and it's a grind in their twenties now, but it gets it gets construed as not working hard a lot of the times and that's the unfortunate part of it, thank you for sharing because I think there are misconceptions and misunderstandings between the different, you know generations and again social media sometimes plays a role in it because you know, as we were, you know didn't necessarily have access until maybe later on, whereas now it's like this is it like, what do you mean there was no internet, right? Or there was no facebook? I was like no, there there wasn't but it's ok. I survived life um and stuff like that. So it's I I I like to ask that because you know, sometimes assumptions can be problematic and when you're making assumptions and generalizations about community or about a generation that that that leads to a lack of understanding, right? And it's so much what's going on in the world right now. That's the last thing that we need. So Sammy, where can we find your podcast? Sure. So it's called the successful millennials podcast. It's on, you know, Apple cast box, Spotify, google all the main streaming platforms. My instagram is at Finance Zilla and thats F I N A N C E Z I L L A And within that there's like there's links to all the different platforms before you want to listen to the podcast. Great. And my last question to, and this is something I asked everyone who I interview, what makes you Sammy a positive professional. If I think it's knowing that there's always the next step to get better at. So I feel like if you're complacent then you're not going to get any better and then you become negative, like start decaying in terms of your mindset. But if there's like, okay, there's a new challenge out there, there's something else I can be, there's something else that I can achieve that I want to and that's just like motivates, energizes me and it makes me like, I don't, I guess vibrant and more positive energy than I would if I was just like, I was the same thing that I'm doing that I did yesterday. So I try to just look at the next challenge and use that to inspire me to be more positive. Thank you so very much Sammy and I really appreciate you giving me the opportunity to interview you and I would like to interview you again at some point. I think there are lots of things that are happening in this country right now and I think being able to get our different perspectives from our different generations, I think we'll be able to help give people a better understanding of how we are looking at things that are going on in the world right now. So you have an open invitation to always thank you, come back and interview with me and again. I thank you for giving me the opportunity to interview in your podcast and this has been great. Thank you. Yeah, I appreciate it. I'd love to come on again and vice versa. I mean, this is a great conversations both ways and I enjoyed it a lot. I think it's good to have different perspectives from other people and building conversations where you can learn more correct, correct. Thanks again. Sammy. Thanks for joining me today. I look forward to you tuning in to another episode. Make sure that you subscribe to this podcast and don't forget to click the like button. You can also follow me on twitter and instagram. Stay safe and be well.