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Mountain Home Man Still Got It

From Audio: Nikki Glaser - Beetender

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station description Welcome to Dumb People Town! Population You!
Dumb People Town
Duration: 07:48
Daniel, Jason, Randy, and Nikki Glaser comment on a news story about Mountain Home man Brent W. Oakley accused of stealing and driving a backhoe.
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Daniel, Jason, Randy, and Nikki Glaser comment on a news story about Mountain Home man Brent W. Oakley accused of stealing and driving a backhoe.
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a Mountain Home man is facing felony theft charge after reportedly driving a backhoe away from a work site. That checks out an officer was dispatched to West Second Street and South Hickory Street. In Mountain Home. In reference to someone stealing a backhoe from a work site. How long do you wait before you call? Because at first you're like this guy working after our, I think you're supposed to leave. Why is that driving off? Workers are shrugging once he pulls into a quick trip, you're like calling the cops. That is not that there is no way he shouldn't be doing that. Picking up Hitchhikers on the street. Yeah, he's in traffic. An officer pulled into a parking lot near the work site after not initially finding the construction vehicle but saw here's our hero Brent W Oakley. A Mountain Home man. I know Oakley and you know that's all he wears that. No for your shirts, wraparound sunglasses, driving the backhoe towards him towards the cop. He's like buddy. Uh no. The man parks the backhoe next to the police officer and told the officer he did not have permission to be driving it. Nor did it belong to him. Oh, I hope that's how he started out. Like he pulled up to this kind of two things. I do not have permission to drive this and it does not belong to me. What else you want to know? Right, I'm gonna head him off at the past. I have dormant herpes and I am also, I also have fear of commitment. I'm out of a brave uh, according to the report, a corporal arrived on the scene. That's big Arkansas cop and told the officer to place Oakley under arrest for theft, which I hope means the first officer was like, he already confessed that we even arrest him to where's the investigation here? Oakley told officers he was drinking. The officer asked him if he would complete a standardized field sobriety test while at the station. And Oakley reportedly told him not to waste his time because he was drunk. Do a field sobriety. Why would I waste your time? We're friends? You wait, have you ever had to do a field sobriety test? Nikki? No, you don't, don't do them. Just say no, say no, but you're saying no, you're smart enough not to drive while even a little bit. Well, I don't drink anymore, But let's say I start again. You always say no, don't do a Breathalyzer. Don't feel field sobriety. Just say okay And then I'm too scared to tell cops you'll lose your license, but then you'll get it back and then you won't have a D. U. I. Because you'll probably get out. Also if a cop pulls up, just take the keys out of the ignition. Always okay if you fall if you fall asleep in your car, I mean keys aren't really everything. A guy in high school and you're not driving it. He was 18, he had left the party and he was and he he was like, I should not be driving. So he pulled over and went to sleep, knock, knock, knock on the window. He gotta do I because his keys were in the ignition which showed an intent to drive. If he had taken his keys out of the ignition that he could have just a campsite for the night. Yeah. Okay. All right. What do you guys think? Oh please Brent W. B. W. O. Well this is blood, blood alcohol content. So this is a great one. How drunk do you have to be to be like, I'm going to take that back home. but then so drunk that you go, hey officer, this is what happened here before you even got here and then be so drunk. Let's not waste your time on me. I'm drunk. So legal limit is point oh eight Knowing that, Where do you think he's at? I'm going to go 0.1 eight. Okay, that's good. That's a good j What do you think? So? Right in the wheelhouse, I have a number just popped to me, so go ahead. I'm going to save and higher point to one. I'm going to say 10.25 point 25 Okay, that's big buckley's blood alcohol level was and then we will guess his age point one zero. What? What is he coming down? I think he just wanted a friend. I think he just wanted a friend. He had just left a cocktail party. What if the fetish for him was admitting things that he was about himself, Like that's what he was like, I want to get in trouble. I want to admit that I'm doing things wrong. I'll drive right up next to a cop. Maybe we'll be friends when you remember when you were kids at like your whatever pool you were at and like if you were at a pool where it was like adult swim and the people would be like, okay, kids get out, you gotta get out the adults, we gotta, they gotta do laps and you just stayed in the police as long as you could until they kicked you out. There was a little feeling of excitement in there. I don't want to call it sexual, but there's a feeling like you rush, maybe that's what you just wanted to rush the rush of kick me out of this pool. What do we have motive? Like was it just he was drunk and he probably knew how to drive this thing. So he's like, oh, let me like you can take that. This reminds me of my you know that that summer. So he's like, let's see if I still got it, yep. Yeah, let's see if I still thing was their nostalgia. I just, I want to know what he's going through. Right, Brent W Oakley is totally the type of guy who has on many occasions said, let's see if I still got it right. I hope his middle name is went Brent went Oakley. Oakley went, okay, here's a picture you guys are gonna get to see him. And then we're going to guess how old he is sometimes by the way, this is that muddies, it makes it can throw you. All right, let's see what he looks like. Oh, his article was like, we got to put bars behind his photo. Otherwise how will people know that he's the guy? It's like if joe Rogan wasn't in shape, you know what I mean? Oh my God, it's like mitch, fitel went on like jerry lewis is predniSONE mitch. He looks like every door guy in florida. That mitch. Oh yeah. He doesn't like move his mouth when he's like a friend who was not identified on like real housewives of New Jersey, loves Huntington Beach, but he just shows up every once in a while and Tito Ortiz. So okay, So he's, but he gets to monster energy is at 7 11 every day for breakfast every day. I put them on the counter when he walked point at something and one of the, you know grills, that's the guy in line with two monster energy's. He's the only guy who's ever, he's the only guy any of us know who has ordered was eating the weeks in 7 11, 7, 11. How old do you think he is? W okay. I'm going to save. Oh my God, this is so hard, Way harder than it should. You know, I'm gonna say he he looks like shit, but so I'm going to say he's younger than I think he is. So I'm going to say he's 35. J what do you think he could be president? Really could qualified. I swear to God, I don't know if this guy is 27 or 47 like he could be things, I'm gonna say 27. I know that's crazy. But I'm gonna now go in the opposite direction. Both of you. I'm gonna say 40 3, 43 wow, we are all all over the place. I'll tell you this. One of you, there's only one year off to change. Everybody gets to go 1/1 down. Nikki. Do you want to go one up, one down? I'm 1 34. I'm going up 28. I'm going 42. His Saturn is returning by the way. All right. I can tell you the Brent W Oakley to round out story number two is 34 years old. You're crushing you. Just walk in and own it, okay?
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