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Severed Legs Were Not Invited To This Fairfield, Ohio Wedding

From Audio: #191 - Like Severed Legs At A Wedding... in Fairfield, Ohio

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station description Two comedians look at a small town, what makes it tick, and a murder that took plac... read more
Small Town Murder
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Duration: 02:24
In Fairfield, Ohio, a picturesque wedding is taking place outdoors, but amidst the ceremony, a bridesmaid notices a severed leg wash up on shore.
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In Fairfield, Ohio, a picturesque wedding is taking place outdoors, but amidst the ceremony, a bridesmaid notices a severed leg wash up on shore. One question remains: would you let CSI take your wedding pictures?
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on February 14th, 1987 Valentine's Day. There's a wedding this day. It's cold, but it's Valentine's Day. People are crazy with dates for weddings. They really are like sometimes you're worried about whether we'll have it when it's nice. But sometimes a date is important, whether it's your anniversary or your something. Valentine's Day is one of those days, so there is a church here. It's the Little Cedar Baptist Church and outside the church, like the church is backed up to a little river. You know it goes down, the long goes down to the river and there's a little river in the background, so it's very nice to hear the river. So these people have planned for a long time this wedding that they're having right there on the bank of the river, right behind the church that they go to on Valentine's Day. Romantic, right big wedding party bride, all dressed in white tuxedos. Everybody's happy little cold. It's February in Indiana. Let's not get wrong here. I'm sure they have sleeves and stuff shot. Romantic is fuck right? I mean, reeks of sulfur, but other than that, Fantastic. Um, okay. What ends up happening though, is an interesting thing. Um, how do you even know how to say this? While the ceremony is about to begin in one of the wedding guests notices something. They look down and they go, Oh, there's a boot right there. Oh, no. There's a There's a boot on the shore of the river and then someone goes, Oh, yeah. Look at that. Oh, my God. It's not a boot. It's an entire leg. It is a severed leg washing up on shore, literally right next to your wedding. So we're gonna go ahead and know this one, right? That's the thing. Either you say fuck this marriage is not or the bride is like I planned this for 14. Nobody sees the lurk. Okay, 14 months. I plan this fucking I don't care if a kindergarten class watches up on shore. We're finishing the fucking wedding. I saw a whole 40 of them. Just all of them. I don't care. Photographers over there taking pictures. Scoop him up later. And you, sir, About the county coroner. Scoop him up later. Came that shit over here. You work for the crime scene. People are May do this. Calm down. C s I get over here or is it like, Does this mean that our marriage is not? That's what I would say as a groom. I'd be like Oh, I got it.
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