had the big blowout talk again, you know, are below that talks or like divorce talks. They're not just like, Hey, let's fight. You know, they've only been divorced. Talks twice. This was a divorced, but I'm saying it to that level. Like that's what it was that and I told you to pack your things and leave you Did you said pack your things and leave. Get go to your mom's. Yes. You did say that. Yes, it was that bad the night where we we did the millennial wedding episode? Yeah, and I find it like in the past, I think I was actively trying, like trying hard, maybe even beyond my like maybe I was trying too hard and it was affecting me in some way and just I was uncomfortable doing it. So it stopped. And then I would go back to, you know, being status quo. And this time I just kind of said, Listen, I I got to take my stresses and that are not at home, not between us, and and work on them and deal with them and not bring them home. And then when I got to realize when I come home. What do I have here? You know, I have to look at you and say what do I have to look at my kids and say, What do I have? And that's the good stuff. And I got a I don't think I don't think I thought about this consciously, but this is looking back thinking to myself, probably what was going on in my mind. So I was able to come home and just kind of just unwind and like, let it be like, let myself just be and go and not not stress about the, you know, the things that I used to stress about here with you guys. And I think I just fell into this routine of just being happy being nice to you because it made me feel good. And I and I in the response that I was getting from you, was so loving and comforting. It was very easy. Thio accept it from you because I hadn't gotten it in so long. I think in the past I was trying to do it, You know what I mean And maybe No, but like I would like, I would go like, even if we weren't fighting. If we were just kind of in past with each other at the time, and I would come for the hug just to say, Hey, look, you know, I'm here kind of thing, or I'm trying like I would show you that it was forced. Yeah, it was an overly felt forced. Exactly. Yeah. It has not felt so It doesn't mean anything. So So I kind of I think looking back at this last month, I just kind of let my guard down and say, Hey, like, just just act how you feel and don't don't force anything on. That's what I did. Well, that night when we were on our way home were driving home and we had, uh it was just a have been a really awful couple weeks. Um e can't get into the details of what we're fighting about right now or anything, maybe later. But it was really awful. And I felt awful on. I think that I I always know. I guess that you don't You don't want this to end. I don't want this to end. And but I couldn't possibly keep going on in that direction. I was just I was for a few weeks. I was just hurting all the time. And so when I said to you, I did say, Pack up your stuff and go to your mom's and a little bit, you know, I was sick to my stomach when I was saying it, but I was also sort of like he needs to realize like we are. This is not I have to some level given you this concrete foundation which you think will always be there. And e think the thought of losing it maybe is the only thing that would whip you into shape. Yeah. Also, I think maybe for the first time, I really saw you and saw how you were feeling, which upset me. It was It was awful. It was awful. I felt like I was in a nightmare that night. Yeah, and I thought, I don't want to feel this way anymore. I just can't live like this anymore. And I was like, It's either word we got to be done. Or do we? If we both really want this, we just have to make it happen. And I have to find out how and why and I could. I was sick, you know, looking at you, knowing how you were feeling. And I don't want you to feel that way. It made me feel even worse. So I finally just had to say to myself Like, it's time for a change. And I don't know what that change is gonna bay. I'm just gonna I'm just gonna be and that's that's what I did. Like like you said before, I I wasn't actively, you know, consciously thinking about Okay, I need to do this this and this to make her feel better and make a relationship. But, like, I didn't do that. And that's probably what I did in the past. Well, this was the first time that you have been consistently in a good mood and feel in seeming like you were You were happy to be home like you were happy to be in the house. All the you know, for a couple years now, it's been that it seems like you're just miserable all the time. Not depressed or anything. Just miserable, Like just a cranky like a cranky ass bitch. I'm sorry. Like that's the only way to put yeah. Really? Like, That's the only way to put it. You're a cranky ass bitch.